Sunday, September 28, 2008

On Peloton

"Peloton" was concieved during the RUSA 300k of spring 08. Eric Vigoren and Mark Thomas had organized this ride considering the fact that the earlier ACP 300k was plagued by inclement weather. The mini-peloton consisted of John D'Elia visiting from Connecticut, SIR's very own Mark Roehrig, Matt Mikul, Chistopher Gay and myself. Matt had set the quick pace as I recall early in the ride and having little faith in my own navigational abilities at that point was determined to stay with the pack. As I drafted in the slipstream earlier on that day, I had a flood of negative memories (basically digging in the dirt, to find the places I got hurt). but with the elevated levels of endorphins, that I find such a marvellous effect of endurance cycling, I was able to put a positive spin on my thoughts by acknowleging my own participation in the creation of that past pain.

A few days later at home musing over all this, I noticed that Alder outside my window in such a joyous dance in the wind. How does it get its own endorphins? And why must I run?

Well! probably because I have an Ego.

And now I am thinking that to have a Healthy Ego, if that is not an Oxymoron, is a balancing act.

If I am to take myself seriously at all, I must make good on most of my commitments, so I must avoid making commitments that I cannot keep. On the other hand I must not take myself so seriously that I have to win in every situation.

That strange insect at the very bottom of Pandora's Box is hope. To live is to hope and what can we hope for if we win it all. Perhaps that is why Lance and so many winners before him must continue to seek battle until they know loss.

I love and appreciate this new community and sport that I have found, it has given me so much freedom on the road to self discovery, even if it means going into a little debt.

Special thanks to Sam Huffman who kindly listened to it's recital as we climbed towards Washington Pass and John Kramer as we fought wind past St. Francis.

1 comment:

Iron Rider said...

". . . acknowleging my own participation in the creation of that past pain."